Life as a mom

The girls were both asleep by 9:45 tonight...a good 3 hours before we used to get them asleep. When they were around 4 weeks we determined they had their nights and days mixed up. They'd sleep like bricks during the day and at midnight we'd be begging them to close their eyes and atleast act tired. We were getting to the point of dreading night time and I was considering hiring night help because we were just so exhausted and they would not go to sleep.

For the past 2 weeks or so we've been keeping them awake more during the day, especially in the evenings. The 1st few days I'd have to wake them up by using a cool washcloth on their neck and feet - mean mommy! I felt horrible but we needed to get to bed earlier and the first night we saw results - an earlier bedtime for all of us - so we continued it and now they fall sleep anywhere from 8:30 - 9:45 and they sleep for 6-10 1/2 hours at night! It is wonderful, they are incredible sleepers and we are thankful since we know with two babies there is a risk of no shut eye for us!

I stopped nursing at about 3 1/2 weeks b/c that was all I did for about 23 1/2 hours a day. I pump now and the girls get 1/2 formula and 1/2 breast milk with every feeding. I feel so much better - I seriously was losing my mind because there were lots of days that I wasn't even getting a shower b/c when I had a break between feedings I had to choose between sleep and a shower and my choice was usually sleep. I just feel a little more like myself now, being able to run to walmart without the girls and not eating every single meal with a baby attached to my chest! It's nice for Eric and all of our family and friends to be able to feed them too.

We are still getting so much help from family and friends. Every week day someone comes to stay with me and help with the babies and housework for part or most of the day. I'm really going to miss this time that I've been able to spend with my sisters in law, aunt, mom and mother-in-law. Eric calls this time off from work my "3 1/2 month vacation" - and though it is no vacation for sure, it definitely is a once in a lifetime opportunity to spend so much time with my babies and my family since work eats up so much of my time otherwise.

The girls are getting so big. They have chubby everything from their cheeks to their hands to their toes. I love every ounce of them...except when I have to carry them in the car seats! I did get out the measuring tape the other night because Kristen and I were in disagreement over who had the chubbier legs, Rylie or Addie (I won but I have spent a lot more time checking them out:). This is one of my favorite pictures...

They smile now and coo (such a weird word). They started cooing at 5 weeks and when they were cooing at the doctors office she told us normally babies don't do that until around 2 months and that the girls were going to be talkers! Their necks and legs are so strong - they have been from day 1. When we put them on their bellies they pick their heads up for long periods and look around. Rylie sucks her thumb, Addie pulls hair. They do so many fun things and make so many funny faces. I could stare at them all day, their faces are so sweet. One of my favorite things to do is watch them sleep. We make time for that because it is so wonderful. They smile these huge toothless grins in their sleep and their eyes flutter like they're winking. when they're not swaddled in a blanket, their arms flail and they startle themselves...it's so funny.

Everyone has always thought Rylie would be the fiesty one, including the nurses at the hospital, because she was demanding in utero and during our hospital stay. But over the past few weeks their personalities seem to be switching. Rylie has become much more laid back and Addie screams until she gets what she wants. She sometimes just wants to be held, which I gladly do, but she will scream until her face is beat red and you pick her up and she is instantly pleasant.

I am returning to work in a few weeks and I have mixed emotions. I'm looking forward to it to get out of the house a little more, to shower and brush my teeth more regularly, and b/c I truly love my job and my clients and am anxious to catch up. But I dread it because I love these little mini Erica's and I love being with them all the time; I don't want to be away from them and miss a moment. Eric's sister watched the girls a week or so ago so we could go to dinner just the two of us and I cried at TGIFridays because I missed them so much. I don't know how I'll handle full days away at work but I'm guessing there'll be lots of tears. I work with all guys so it will be fun to see how they handle my emotions!

I am still daily in disbelief that I have two babies. The girls will be laying on their play mat together and I have this moment of shock where I think "oh my gosh, there are two of them and they are both mine!" I often wonder why God chose me, us, for these girls' parents. I think they are so perfect and feel so undeserving to be their mom but I am so thankful he has given them to us. I hope down the road they understand how much they are loved by us and how our world truly does revolve around them and may they be just as thankful that we are their mom and dad as we are that they are our daughters.

The final days

The girls were born on July 7th and everything happened so quickly I haven't had time to write about the final doctor's appointments.

The doctor have given the ok for me to be induced on July 7th but at my last appointment and sonogram on July 6th we got a surprise - our angel Addison had completely flipped and was breech so we became an automatic c-section. I didn't even feel disappointed - it felt so good to have the decision made and a plan together and the end in sight.

We went in to the hospital on Wednesday morning and were so excited to have both of our moms, sisters in laws Laurie, Kristen & Nichole and my Aunt Mel hanging out with us while we waited for our turn. Our scheduled section kept getting pushed back because we weren't an emergency and there were several labors that had turned into sections. We didn't mind too much because the time was passing quickly as we were having so much fun with our family. Eventually though we did start getting anxious b/c I was starving and we were just ready to meet the girls.

A few minutes after 11 my water broke naturally- so the girls were planning to come on the 7th anyways! Because Addison was the first baby (the presenting baby) and she was breech we became the emergency and finally things started moving very quickly and before we knew it we were in the operating room.

After my water broke I had intense labor and I felt so relieved that I was having a c-section instead of having to labor for hours. I had no energy and couldn't handle the pain and the closeness and intensity of the contractions. I was crying and begging for pain meds, it was so miserable.

The c-section wasn't scary at all. All of the prep part of it went so well and quickly. I felt instant relief the moment they pulled Rylie, our first born, out. Addie was supposed to be first but since she was breech she was yanked out second. I'll never forget what I felt when they said she was out and the doctor said "oh, my gosh. she's huge!"

I had some complications with hemorraging and clotting that got a little scary but thankfully was under control by the night. I had a blood transfusion b/c I had lost so much blood. Eric is the same blood type as me and I would've rather had his blood given to me but there wasn't time for him to donate and the blood to be screened. I'm thankful for the people who give blood so that I have it but it's still weird to have strangers' blood in me.

We're still not certain if they're identical or not. They look so much alike but there are a few small differences. We painted one of Rylie's toenails just in case in the coming weeks they continue to look more alike, we'd hate to get them mixed up!

We are home now - the girls are 4 weeks today as I finish this post. It is extremely overwhelming - having 2 newborns - when we don't have much experience with babies to start with. But we get tons of help from family and friends and we're figuring things out as we go. We adore these baby girls so much and though sometimes it's hard b/c things are so hectic, we are really now trying to enjoy every moment with them b/c the time is whizzing by.

Here's our baby girls, Addie is on the left and Rylie is on the right. They are so sweet and snuggly - we try and take advantage of the snuggling because already they're staying awake more and becoming more squirmy and it won't be long until they aren't the curled up little ball in our arms anymore.

We're excited about the future with the girls and it is definitely the most amazing thing - being mom and dad to these perfect babies and the love we feel that just cannot be described. We are blessed.

Nothing scheduled...

I had a sonogram and doctor's appointment yesterday. I saw my actual doctor who I'll continue seeing now through the end.

The sonogram was great but sad because it's likely our last one until delivery day in the hospital (to make sure they're in the right position for delivery). We still can't believe it but the girls' estimated weight is 6 pounds each! Even if that estimate is on the high side they still should be well over 5 pounds which is great! So we're excited about that.

We got to see their faces again and it makes us so excited to meet them; they are adorable and have round cheeks! They also look more alike in these pictures than they did at the last ultrasound. The technician let us watch the girls in 4D so it's like watching a live video of them - Rylie kept sticking out her toungue and Addison nose was getting pressed against something and was squished down. They are so tight in my belly right now.

I talked with my doctor about how at my last appointment, the doctor I saw seemed to be recommending that I opt for a c-section and I wanted to get his opinion on that. I was definitely considering it based on the risks I was told, the intense amount of work it will be to push out 2 babies and the fact that I would schedule it at like 7:30 and have my babies by 7:45!! But my doctor said he felt that there's no reason I shouldn't try to deliver them like I've wanted to all along and that he thought I could definitely do it. He also said that there are risks but since I'll already be in the operating room, everything will be set up for an emergency c-section already and that they are prepared for anything that may come up. He also said that the recovery for a c-section will be much longer for me and that won't be any fun with 2 newborns to care for.

So I feel much better and am sticking with my original plan to deliver them. The negative side of this is that he said it's much better to let things happen naturally so we didn't get to schedule anything!! Each doctor is different so it was weird to hear last week that that doctor would let me schedule a date next week to be induced or have a c-section but my doctor wants me to keep waiting. The longest he'll make me wait is 38 - 38 1/2 weeks so that is about 2 weeks or less from now. And he said there's a good chance I'll go before that on my own.

I have been having lots of contractions still and though sometimes they are coming 8 minutes or so apart, after awhile they slow down instead of coming closer. So I'm just suffering through this and hoping this doesn't go on for the next couple weeks - hopefully it's the start of it all and that it means we'll be having babies in the next few days!

I have slept so much these past 2 days. I had been having trouble sleeping at night or napping during the day the past week or two. I think getting to see my doctor yesterday and his opinion on everything has made things in my head settle down a little too so that has helped. I just feel so tired all the time.

We're getting the final things ready for them to arrive and cleaning everything one last time. It seems like there is always more we find that should be done before they're here. I want to go out to dinner this week sometime too since I feel like it may be a long time until we get to do that after they're born!

Hopefully we'll have some news soon...

I can't grow anymore

I have gotten so big over these past few weeks. I have a sonogram tomorrow and am thinking the girls must be well past 5 pounds at this point for me to have grown so much so fast. I am looking forward to hearing their estimated weights and seeing them again...hopefully this is my last doctor's appointment!

At my last appointment the doctor that I saw said that I can schedule to be induced or have a c-section between 37 & 38 weeks. I'll finish week 37 on Sunday so I think sometime next week we'll have babies! I see my own OB tomorrow who has the final say on when I can schedule so depending on what he says will I guess decide when we can schedule. It's so close yet still a ways away but there's always the chance that I'll go before the scheduled date as well...

During week 35 I spent 2 different days back in the hospital for contractions. Tuesday the 8th I got no sleep b/c i had contractions all night long. I called the doctor's office around 5 and she said I could go right to the hospital or come in to the doctors office 1st thing around 7:30. I opted to go to the doctor's office and they did a non stress test and sent me over to the hospital anyways b/c one of the baby's heart rate wasn't reactive - it's supposed to fluctuate up and down so many beats in a certain time frame and hers wasn't doing that.

At the hospital they monitored the girls and after an hour or so both heart rates were fluctuating properly so they gave me a medicine - Terbutaline - to stop the contractions. It kicked in and I went home a few hours later with a prescription to take 4 times a day until I finished week 36.

On Saturday night the contractions started up again and were coming 6 minutes apart and they were by far the most intense I had ever had. So we went back to the hospital around midnight where they gave me another shot of the Terbutaline. My contractions started coming 3-4 minutes apart so they gave me another shot and about an hour later a pill form of the same medicine.

It slowed down the contractions finally but the side effects of the medicine is that it makes you feel jittery, shaky and your heart races so that much in such a short time for me made me feel like crawling out of my skin. I could not lay still and my eyes and legs were twitching, it was so weird. It was such a relief to finally head home and I slept most of the day Sunday after getting no sleep during the night.

So this past Sunday I finished 36 weeks and took my last Terbutaline pill. If I would go in to labor now they wouldn't stop it and they're no longer trying to prevent it. It's been 2+ days and though I've had contractions, they're not consistent or super intense so for now we're just waiting. After tomorrow we should be able to schedule something and know the absolute last day of this misery.

I'm having an awful time sleeping - part of it is I'm not really comfortable and I think a lot of it is my mind is constantly moving...and the hourly bathroom breaks don't make for a good night's sleep either. I feel like I function pretty well for not getting much sleep so I think it's been good preparation for the girls' arrival.

My cousin Jes was over with her new baby today and he slept for nearly the entire time she was here...made it look easy. I hope we get atleast one baby that is content and loves to sleep and I wouldn't mind if both were "easy" babies!

I'll update tomorrow with what my doctor says.

Hospital visits, massage and stretch marks!

33 weeks in white shirt, 34 weeks in the black shirt

So much has happened over the last few weeks...

Shortly after my last post, I got the flu and had to go into the hospital for a couple days because I got dehydrated. I looked and felt so awful and the dehydration brought on contractions. The day after I was discharged from the hospital, I started having stronger, more frequent, contractions. So Nichole took me to the hospital after work where I stayed a few hours where they monitored the babies and rehydrated me. I've heard that many people who have had twins have had to be in the hospital from week 20 - 30 (or whenever they delivered) to be monitored constantly on bedrest. I feel so bad for them! It was miserable being there; not being in my own bed, having the nurses flip the lights on every two hours in the middle of the night, and hooked up to monitors constantly!

During my 2nd hospital visit, I noticed a weird mark on my belly near my belly button and I asked the nurse if it was a stretch mark. She said it looked like it was! I was disappointed and she said, "Really? did you think you were going to have twins and not have stretch marks?" and I said, "Yes, I was hoping!" Since then, around my belly button, I've gotten several and they've gotten bigger and darker. I keep slathering on the lotion, as I have the ENTIRE pregnancy, but it only does so much. Now I'm hopeful they'll go away over time...

One thing I am looking forward to about going back to the hospital is the food was really good. Before I was discharged on Wednesday, I had turkey and mashed potatoes for dinner. It was delish! AND the nurse let me have chocolate ice cream! MMM!

Ever since then, I've been having contractions daily. Thankfully so far I'm not dialating - I just need to be drinking more water. So now I've been chugging as much as I can stand.

The only good thing about the hospital visit was that it got me a sonogram 2 weeks ahead of my next scheduled sonogram. Since Rylie hasn't been facing forward, we haven't seen her face since March. So before we went in, Eric told Rylie that she better show her face or she was going to get a spankin'! And the threatening worked! We got to see her face and she looked like she was scowling - she's a sassy girl!

Even better news is that she had rotated and was head down again! We're really excited about that because the doctors require both girls be in this position for me to deliver vaginally.

I've had two doctors appointments since that sonogram and they both are still head down! We pray they will stay that way! Another exciting milestone we learned at the sono is that both girls' estimated weight is just over 4 pounds!

The doctors have told me that I need to start counting their movements daily. Rylie definitely meets her quota well before the day begins. Addison, however, moves much less and sometimes has me worried. But I was reassured at this last appointment as the doctor said Rylie is overactive, not that Addison is "under-active".

We can't wait to see if their personalities after birth match how they are now. Rylie is active and wild and Addison is restful and calm. We still love to watch their movements in my belly. Sometimes we can figure out which body part it is, other times, we have no clue. Because Rylie is so active, she gives everyone who touches her a little kick!

Because my blood sugar levels were high, the doctor had me start taking a pill called Glyburide. At first it made me sick because the dosage was too high. It made my sugar levels super low which made me shaky, dizzy, and sweaty. So now I take only a quarter of a pill and it has regulated my blood sugar and it's been at much more reasonable levels most of the time. I have a few high readings once in a while, but it's when I know I've been eating things I shouldn't have eaten.

Last week, Lori treated me to a pregnancy massage. It was so heavenly, I scheduled another one for this week! My back and body ache so much and during the massage, it was the first time in forever where I felt comfortable and not miserable. I wish that I would have gotten one (or a few!) sooner.

At last Tuesday's appointment, the doctor gave me some good news that previously I had dreaded. Now, because I feel so miserable, I willingly accept his advisement that I stop working. So Friday, June 4th, at nearly 34 weeks, was my last day of work. When I left that day, I was really sad and sentimental because I'll be off for nearly 3 months and will miss my co-workers and the work. But, it will be so nice to not have to get up and ready in the mornings and be uncomfortable all day. Rather, I can just rest and relax and wait for the babies.
Though I'm looking forward to a couple weeks of rest and getting last minute things prepared, I'm hopeful that this doesn't stretch into weeks and weeks of waiting.

At my doctor's appointment today, she told me to have my bags packed and, though there's no reason to think I'll go really early, the normal twin pregnancy doesn't last much longer than where I'm at now so it could be any time. We're definitely ready and really excited!

A long time!

This will be a big one I have weeks to catch up on. I just haven't had the time or energy to post an update but I want to get it on here so I remember.

Here are some recent pictures - I've grown so much over the last few weeks, and most of it has been straight out!

Here I am a week ago at 30 weeks (we made it to the 30's!!!)

And 2 weeks earlier at 28 weeks

We have picked names!! It was good timing, because we were able to tell everyone at the baby showers what their names are. Baby A is Addison Lynne and we'll call her Addie and Baby B is Rylie Ann. The middle names are both family names.

I've had a couple sonograms over the past few weeks. Rylie still hasn't turned back into the head down position, nor is she showing her face. Hopefully she's not as much trouble when she's born as she is now! On Wednesday the sonogram technician really tried to get a shot of her face but there was no luck so we got her spine and feet instead. It has been probably 8 or 9 weeks since we've seen her face now so I was disappointed about that. Maybe next time.

The doctors were concerned for awhile b/c the girls were both measuring really small but over the last six weeks they have grown so much! I am going back on Tuesday to see the doctor who said a few weeks ago he would recommend a steroid shot to help develop their lungs since he predicts they'll be born early. But he said if he sees good growth that might not be necessary yet. Addison is estimated at 3 pounds 4 ounces and Rylie has grown a ton over the past few weeks and has passed Addison - she's estimated at 3 pounds 11 ounces. We'll see what he recommends on Tuesday.

A week or so ago I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes - I was definitely frustrated b/c I've been trying to be so healthy. I am now more educated and know it has nothing to do with how healthy you are but getting it under control is all about food choices from now on. I have to check my blood sugar 4 times a day. I've been eating according to the diet that the dietician prescribed and my blood sugar has often been sky high...especially today. I called the nurse tonight and she said to monitor it tomorrow and be sure to call the office on Monday. I'm starting to wonder if that's why the girls all the sudden are gaining so much weight and want it under control before I have 10 pound twin girls! I know there are worse side effects for them too so I just want to get it straightened out.

The past few weeks I have become more and more uncomfortable, which I hadn't thought possible. I am so out of breath - even doing nothing! I feel stretched to the max like my stomach could split open at any second. It's so awful and to make it worse, there is always a couple elbows or heels pushing out against my taut skin. I wake up several times in the night - both to pee and to roll over (which is a big production getting my belly rolled over) b/c the hip that I'm laying on is burning and in so much pain. It feels like I'm sleeping on a concrete floor, they just ache so much. I really don't understand how people choose to put themselves through pregnancy multiple times! I'm sure I'll feel differently when the girls are here and maybe "forget" all the misery like everyone says you do after the birth.

I am so not myself physically, mentally and lately emotionally. I'm really looking forward to being myself again and being able to do things for myself. I appreciate so much all that family and friends have done - but it will be nice to be capable of doing these things myself again.

I'll try to post pictures of the nursery soon. I love it so much.

I can't believe how far we've made it - I wanted so bad just to make it to the critical 23rd week and now here we are at 31 weeks. I can't believe it - I know it's still early but we're just at a much safer point now and no reason to believe we don't have several more weeks to go. It's so crazy to think that in a month these girls just might be here...we can't wait.

Quick update

I finished week 27 yesterday. I can't believe I'm in my 3rd trimester already! It is going by fast though on my miserable days I wish it'd go faster.

I haven't had any problems over the last few weeks and it's been a very worry free period of time for me - it's been great. I do have back and hip pain and feel like I'm 100 years old with the way I ache and how uncomfortable I feel. The most annoying thing as of late is that often I have to get up slowly and walk around so slowly because if I move too quickly there is risk of me peeing myself! When people tell me I'm waddling or ask why I'm getting up so slowly, I blame my back and hips which is true...but not 100% of the story:)

Busy season is officially over and it feels great!! I'm going to be working 30 hours a week from now on and have my Saturdays back to do some preparing for baby. Work is just as busy for me every second I'm there since I'm still trying to get 40 hours of work done in 30 hours but it's just a good feeling to get past April 15th.

This past Saturday Eric's mom had a baby shower for me at Nunzi's. It was so nice, the food (breakfast - yummy) was fabulous and everyone gave such generous gifts to us for the girls. I have some pictures I'll post in the next few days so you can see some of what we got. I love having baby stuff in the house now and I keep looking through everything over and over again.

My biggest craving still is fruit....especially oranges, pinapple and grapes. I bought a fresh pineapple and I cut it when it was ripe and I think Eric was too slow to get any of it b/c I ate it so quickly. It hit the spot. Peanut butter is still the love of my life - Barkley and I have some together every morning.

Eric has the nursery finished - painted, furniture arranged and some other new updates made. It was starting to stress me out b/c I wanted it done well in advance of the shower and he was dead set on doing it in his own time:) But it's done now and he did a great job.

My next sonogram is Friday - as always, I'm looking forward to it and am hopeful the girls are growing well and that they're facing forward so we can see their faces this time.

So much for a quick update! It's late and I'm rambling...I'll post pics soon.

25 week picture

This is us on Easter when I was finishing up week 25. Likely our last holiday without babies!! Actually, we shouldn't have them by Memorial Day so this is our last major holiday just the two of us.

My sonogram and appointment on last Friday went pretty good. Lots of good news. The hematoma is gone...and BABY B was head down!!! I am really excited that both babies are in the right position but know there is still time for them to move. My fingers are crossed they just stay put.

The annoying part was that both babies were facing toward the back so we didn't get to see their little faces at all. I wanted to see them so bad but will have to wait until next time. There really are no good pictures to share this time so I'll wait and post from my next sonogram - they scheduled it in 3 weeks this time instead of 4 so we won't have to wait as long. Grammy K is coming with me this time so hopefully the girls show up and show their faces.

The doctors appointment went okay too. She said the babies are measuring small so they're going to monitor their growth closely - which I think they do anyways. Hopefully they catch up soon. I had a few days a week or two ago when I really felt hungry but that's gone again. I don't feel hungry too often, I usually eat because something sounds good, because I know I need to, or because I'm trying to make myself thirsty so I can chug water. I'm gaining weight so hopefully it's going straight to them.

I've had a few dizzy spells again - last weekend in Walmart Eric had to come pick me up b/c my ears plugged and I couldn't see and I felt like I was blacking out. The walmart employee got me a chair and some juice and I sat for a half hour or so and felt better. I think my blood sugar might just have been low b/c the juice seemed to help.

At my next doctor's appointment, which is a few days after my sonogram appointment, I have to drink the orange liquid stuff and they'll screen for gestational diabetes.

Eric finished painting the girls' room and he's starting to set the cribs up now. The bedding is being made by a woman at my mom's church and she's gotten quite a bit of it done. I got to preview the bed skirts today and they look so great. It's just what I wanted. So exciting to be close enough now that we are getting ready for their arrival!

It's been awhile

Here is my latest belly shot, it was from this past Sunday when we were finishing week 24.




We have a doctor's appointment and sonogram tomorrow morning so I'll post some new pictures of the girls, hopefully this weekend. I'm excited as always to see how they are, how big they are, and what position they're in. I'm hopeful that Baby B has flipped around and is head down but we might go and find out Baby A is flipped and they're both in the wrong position.

I've been feeling so much movement from them, I think they're wild. I feel it in different spots than before which increases my hopefulness that it's because they've changed positions. It could very well be that they've grown and their arms and legs just are stretching further. Over the past few days, above my belly button, something bony like an elbow or heel is pressing out. It's not sticking out constantly but when she's moving it moves across my stomach and we can trace the movement with our hand and press against it. Pretty cool but pretty painful sometimes.

I went to the doctors again last week for a slight problem which ended up being fine - but while there she told me I should be drinking 80 - 96 ounces of water a day to avoid the cramping and tightness in my stomach. It's an insane amount and I definitely hadn't been drinking that much. So last week I was chugging water and getting close to 70 ounces...and making close to 70 trips to the bathroom, but I was feeling better. And it definitely makes a difference in how I feel b/c this week I just can't get the water down like I did last week and the tightness and uncomfortableness is back. So I'm trying to drink more b/c i know how incredibly important it is.

It is so nice outside and it is killing me not to be able to go out and take a walk. I can't wait to be able to be active again. I do so much laying around on the couch in the dark (the curtains have to be closed or there's a glare on the tv!) and I really can't stand it. I really feel bad for people in poor health that can't get out, it's no fun.

My lunch time is up. Getting back to work now. My shorter work days are making such a big difference in how I feel and I only have two Saturdays left during busy season and then I'll have the entire weekend. By the time I get home I'm too tired to do anything but we have cupboards and closets that need cleaned out. I'll be able to get more done around the house when I'm working even less. Can't wait.

Happy Easter!!

Starting another week

I got online awhile ago to write an update, but instead have been watching my belly bump around while I'm laying down. They babies are really active right now and you can see my stomach move up and down where they're pushing or kicking. It's so fun to see and feel them.

Thursday night they were moving like crazy and so Eric came over to feel and they stopped! It happened two times that night while we were watching tv, I called him over and then he'd try to feel and nothing! He was getting annoyed but I thought it was funny. That night neither Eric or I could sleep and we ended up watching wheel of fortune in the middle of the night and they started moving then so he finally got to feel them again.

I've been so uncomfortable and in so much pain the past few weeks so Thursday I called my doctors office and they had me come in just for a check up. I saw a physician's assistant and she said she doesn't think it's contractions but more just skin and muscle stretching b/c the pain in my stomach is constant and doesn't come and go.

I was relieved to hear that - I had hoped that's all it was but since I really don't know what's normal and what's not I just felt better going in. My hips and back hurt constantly too which I know is common but the pain in my stomach was scaring me.

Eric and I went and picked out paint today!! He painted a little on the wall when we got home and I love it already. I'm so excited for it to be painted and the furniture set up.

We ran a few other errands after church and then came home and I fell right asleep! It's amazing how tired I get and how I can be doing nothing and be exhausted.

Speaking of tired, I'm ready for bed. Tomorrow we start week 24!! Mondays are extra hard to pull myself out of bed so I think I'm going to bed early.

Pictures

Here are a couple of the sonogram pictures from March 5th. This first one is a profile of Baby A and you can see Baby B's foot in her face.



This is a shot of Baby B in 3D


Aaagghhh...below is Baby A yawning and she looks like a dinosaur!

And this is a profile of Baby B with A's butt in her face. Poor girls already seem so cramped and things are only going to get tighter!!

This is my latest belly pic - we finish Week 22 today. We're laughing b/c Eric was making fun of my belly button. It's been starting to stick out for a few weeks now, but today it looks really weird...

March 5th doctor appointment

I haven't had a chance to log my thoughts from my doctors appointment and sonogram last Friday and if I wait much longer I'll forget what went on!

My mom went to the sonogram with me since Eric was out of town and it was so cool for her to see the babies and experience it all. It is amazing how much you can see - organs, facial features, movement, etc. The sonogram tech said the girls look great (we had a different tech this time who confirmed they are both girls!!), they're measuring right on (estimated 10 inches and 12 ounces) and they don't see any problems or issues. The hematoma is still hanging out with them, but it's gotten quite a bit smaller in the past 4 weeks and should continue to do so.

I'm slightly concerned b/c Baby B isn't head down and I know she still has time to turn around but the bigger she gets the less likely she'll flip over...and that would mean an automatic c-section. I cannot imagine trying to recover from a c-section while trying to care for 2 newborns and I am praying that she cooperates. I haven't lost all hope b/c I feel them moving SO much these days so I know there's still a chance for them to both be in the right position.

Eric got to feel them move for the first time right before he left for Vegas - he was pretty excited about it! He's felt them a few times since, now they are moving so much it's much easier to catch it. I feel it constantly. I feel it way more on my left side and I was worried about the baby on the right but they were both moving around like crazy during the appointment so there's nothing to worry about after all.

I did learn that I already can't keep them straight I guess. Baby A is on my lower right side and B is upper left...the tech said they've always been that way though I could swear I was told opposite?? I don't know, my memory is so bad so maybe I knew at one point in time but forgot. She showed me exactly where they're positioned so I know what and who I'm feeling when they move - pretty cool. So, what I feel the most is Baby B's feet kicking around - practicing her cheerleading jumps already:)

I saw a new doctor this appointment b/c they want you meet them all so that you're comfortable with whoever is on call when you deliver. I had a woman this time and I really liked her. I had mentioned to her that I have been having really uncomfortable tightness in my stomach especially at nights and that I think it's too much work not enough rest. She agreed and gave me a note for work that I should cut back to less than 40 hours. The partners at work were supercool about it and I can't believe how understanding and accomodating they have been to me. A huge relief.

Overall a good appointment, seemed like mostly good news. I just want the weeks to keep passing so that they keep growing and we get closer to full term. I try not to think about it all the time but can't help but pray pray pray that I can carry them until they are full term and healthy. I hear so much about twins born early or with problems and I try to tell myself that's not my story but it's hard not to worry about it, especially when I feel tightness in my stomach and I'm not sure if it's growing/stretching and normal or cramping and not normal.

We keep counting down the weeks and are getting more and more and more excited!!

20 WEEKS!!

Monday after finishing 20 weeks! The last 3 or 4 pictures that we've taken have been in gray pants and black shirt intentionally - the websites say I can compare my growth better by wearing the same outfit. But I did get bored so I changed it up - though I might need to retire this shirt soon, it doesn't look like it fits right anymore.

We're all doing good. I feel lots of movements often...I feel the most movement on my lower left side which normally is Baby A unless they've swapped spots. Maybe Baby B is a sleeper?? It'd be great if atleast one is a good sleeper. Eric hasn't gotten to feel them yet though he tries to feel every week when we're at church?? I guess that's the only time we really have where nothing is going on and we're actually next to each other...but soon they should be kicking hard and often enough that he can feel them.

We have been picking out bedding and baby gear and I'm getting so excited for these girls to arrive. It makes it so much more real picturing my girls swinging in the swing or wearing an outfit. I am trying not to wish away this time of being pregnant and really enjoying it all - and I am enjoying it and am patiently waiting for them. My excitement after every week that passes is mostly because it brings us closer and closer to very important weeks of growth, development and viability.

I am counting down the days until Friday when I have my sonogram and get to see the doctor. This sonogram is the longest one we'll have where they measure and inspect all the organs and count fingers and toes. I didn't do a great job of taking vitamins early on, especially enough for two babies seeing as to how I didn't know, and I'm worried they were lacking something they needed. Reassurance should come Friday.

I smell cookies baking...Eric's cravings are stronger than mine!! But I know he's making chocolate peanut butter cookies and since the girls already share my passion for chocolate and peanut butter I'm not going to deny them!!

Thanks for thinking of and praying for us.

Update

Babies and I have been doing well. The past couple of days I've been working a few less hours at work and though I'm still uncomfortable in the evenings, I'm not as exhausted and emotional and in tons of pain like I had been.

This week I feel so uncomfortable - mostly in my stomach. I'm not sure if it's because I'm sitting all day instead of laying down and I'm not getting to stretch out...or if it's growing pains. I hope it's just a phase and that in a few days I'll have a period of relief. Last night I really felt like they both just had their hands and feet pushing outwards against my stomach. It was so uncomfortable and I felt like I could pop. Not sure what was really going on.

The new excitement is that I feel the babies moving. Over the past few days especially I can feel them moving inside and sometimes it feels like they bump or push against the inside of my stomach. It is such a cool and sort of weird feeling but it's a way of knowing they're moving and growing. It'll be fun to see how active they are next Friday at the sonogram.

The nursery furniture came in and Eric and his dad and Danny picked it up from Babies R Us last weekend...too bad 1/2 of it was damaged!! Luckily we have lots of time and they actually called yesterday to say the new pieces are in so Eric just has to head back up there to pick it up.

We're deciding...and not necessarily agreeing...on the bedding and decor of the nursery. I don't want it really girly!!! And Eric doesn't want it too boyish. Neutral is neutral...not boyish! We'll decide soon and get the room painted and the furniture in the right room instead of every other room in the house!!!

Lots of fun exciting stuff for us. It's been stressful b/c I don't have the time to get much done this time of year, but it's been so fun and I feel much relief everytime we get something checked off our list...my list:) I'm an obsessive list maker!! But it helps keep my mind sane.

18 weeks

These pictures are from Monday at 18 weeks.





These past few weeks have been a little rough. Something hurts constantly...whether it's my hips, back or my stomach. Lately it's especially my stomach. It's like I can feel my belly and organs stretching as they're growing and it does not feel good.


I have still been working alot which is not helping. I am sooo tired when I get home which makes me even more sore...and cranky! Yesterday I was working with 3 guys who were cracking each other up all afternoon and I found them extremely annoying and I couldn't hide my feelings. Starting next week I am planning to cut back at work and see if I feel a little better. This can't be good for any of us and I really don't care about how I feel except it really makes me worry about the babies.


I cannot believe we are at the halfway point...maybe even beyond (assuming I don't go until 40 weeks)! The weeks are really flying by still, I think the busyness at work can be credited with that. Two weeks from today I have my next doctor's appointment and sonogram and can't wait to see the girls again and hear heartbeats.


I did go to the dentist this week and was expecting to have a cavity or two from the middle of the night eating I was doing during the first trimester...and this may sound gross, but I hate brushing my teeth THOUGH I STILL DO IT REGULARLY though just not as religiously as before b/c the toothpaste tastes awful to me now and leaves a gross taste in my mouth...but thankfully and surprisingly no cavities and he said my teeth were very clean! Little surprises make my day these days.


I thankfully don't have any weird cravings or obsessions with foods and most all of the strong food aversions I had during the first 15 or 16 weeks seem to be gone. I LOVE vegetables again and feel so much better about what I'm eating and feeding to the girls these days. I'm also happy to say that the extreme hunger that was waking me up in the middle of the night during the first trimester is gone!! I haven't been waking up in the middle of the night lately to pee either and it is WONDERFUL!! I know it won't last but I'm grateful now.


One fun thing I forgot to say on the last blog is that the doctor said there is a chance the girls could be identical. It's more likely they're fraternal b/c of how rare identical twins are but there is still a possibility. I had thought that because they are in two separate sacs that that would mean they are fraternal but that is not necessarily the case. We won't know until after they are born but will be fun to find out.


Fun weekend planned...Andrew, Emily and Lucas are in town for a visit so can't wait to see them and spend time with them and the family this weekend.

Daddy's instincts already kicking in

So we had our appointment on Friday morning and they were able to tell us the babies' genders...we are having 2 girls!! Just as Eric suspected.

I was so surprised - I definitely felt like it was two boys or maybe one of each....never thought it'd be two girls b/c all I've ever been around is brothers and boys! I always just thought I'd be a mom of boys. We are super excited and now we can plan the nursery, pick names, talk to the babies like they're girls (b/c I've been picturing boys in my head when I talk to them)...so much fun. I'm especially excited for the girls b/c I didn't have a sister growing up and missed that so I'm happy they'll have each other.

My hematoma has shrunk which was the other great news of the day. It's still there, but heading in the right direction. Dr. Scutella said he thinks it will continue to shrink and doesn't feel like it should be a problem in the future (other than maybe a little more spotting). I was relieved b/c I thought the awful cough that I had for a week had squished the babies with all of the ab squeezing or maybe done something negative to the hematoma but it had no effect on either.

He cleared me to walk on the treadmill again which I'm excited about. I don't plan on breaking any records but it will be nice to get up and get moving again!

I have another appointment and another sonogram in 4 weeks so we have that to look forward to. Eric will actually be in Vegas with his dad and brother so my mom is going to come with me - I'm excited about it, I think she'll love seeing the sonogram happen and hearing the heartbeats.

I'll have to post the sonogram pictures soon - in one of the pictures the baby's thumb is sticking up in the air and I think she's going to have a Kensinger thumb!! If you're not familiar with that, you'll have to see Eric's thumb sometime - he's pleased about it since the girls won't carry on his last name he's glad they'll carry on his family's thumb! Too cute.

16 week belly pic

Here we are at 16 weeks. Still growing!



We've been doing well. Working a little less has made a big difference in how I feel. I've got an awful cough that started this weekend which is in my chest but hurts my stomach when I cough. I've been banned from all exercise and am not supposed to do anything that engages my stomach so I can't imagine all this coughing and tightening of my abs is helping the whole situation but we'll see on Friday. Hopefully it doesn't turn into another round of bronchitis and a cracked rib b/c my rib is finally feeling healed and I'm worried if it's going to be 100% before babies are kicking it.

Over this week the babies' ears are continuing to develop and they are able to start hearing our voices so the expectant mom's websites say to start talking, singing and reading to them which will help them recognize our voices when they're born. It's been so fun talking to them, they're little people (the size of avocados!) and I love telling them what we're doing, where we're going or what we're eating!! I've been teasing Eric that they're going to know my voice and the NBA announcers' voice b/c he has the Cavs games on like 4 nights a week!

Eric has made other sleeping arrangements for himself b/c he can't get any sleep in our bed. I guess I moan all night - and I know I do, b/c I wake myself up doing it sometimes. I thought it was happening all this time because I was feeling so sick all day and night but apparently even though I'm feeling better I still do it. So Barkley and I cuddle at night for now and hopefully eventually I'll stop moaning and Eric can get sleep with us again.

I think it'd be fun to hear what everyone thinks we're having - two boys, two girls or one of each. If you have time to email or leave a comment about what you think, I'd enjoy reading it. I think it's two boys and Eric thinks it's two girls. Our appointment is at 7:00 a.m. on Friday so we'll know pretty early...if we are even able to find out.

Well, I'm off to bed. I'm working in Meadville starting tomorrow and it's very early mornings and longer days. Looking forward to the weekend!

Sonogram 1/21

Here are the pics from our sonogram last Thursday. Nichole scanned them and saved them since I was having trouble and it was taking me forever!

This is Baby B being a stinker and curled up in a ball - didn't want to show his/her face for awhile.

These ones crack me up - Baby A is sticking his butt in poor Baby B's face. I am certain Baby A is a boy because he already is starting trouble!

And this is Baby B saying "enough already!". The Baby was moving its arms around while we were watching the video and the sonogram tech caught a picture. It was like he was trying to push Baby A's butt out of his face!

They are so little and bony which is good I guess b/c I don't want to carry around all of that extra weight this early...but I can't wait till they have some chub on them! I have no doubt they will because we have been eating really well lately...and not healthy well!

Hope you enjoy these...I am bummed b/c we didn't plan on having a sonogram this morning so we didn't have a DVD with us. It would've been a great one to have a video of because the sonogram tech just let it play on the video for so long for us so we could watch them. We are planning to take one next Friday and hopefully be able to get each one thereafter on DVD to keep.

Love you all...take care!

15 Weeks Down

So much has changed in the last week, especially the size of my belly. For some reason, we have a really hard time taking a picture on the day we start a new week. Tomorrow morning hopefully we'll get one and I can post it.

We had to go back to the doctors on Thursday morning b/c I was spotting again. We got right in for a sonogram and the babies were moving all around so they are fine. Bad news is that the hematoma has grown...in just two weeks. We didn't get a chance to see the doctor himself so that we could ask him what that means exactly but we'll see him in less than 2 weeks and will ask him our million questions. The nurse from the sonogram center who called with the doctor's results did say that I can basically only go to work and sit all day, then come home and lay around all night. No exercising whatsoever!! So I imagine my growth will be exponential from now on. I hate being so sedentary but will do it for the babies sake. We have some sonogram pictures to show...I forgot to scan them at work today but will do it and post them soon. I look forward to the sonograms, that is the best part of the whole experience - getting to see them moving and kicking around. This time the sonogram technician just let us watch several minutes of them in action rather than the still shots. I feel like they have personalities already. I can't wait till the 5th to hear the heartbeats again b/c that is so incredible too.

I did talk to the partners at work about the long hours and the rest that I'm not getting that I need so bad and how I don't feel like I'm really doing what's best for the babies. I was really stressed out about work and the hematoma and TWINS and had hardly been able to sleep. Well, I'm so glad that I talked to them b/c they were super understanding and they were convincing me that the babies and my health right now are way more important than work and they said not to worry that the work will get done. I just feel bad b/c this is such a hard time of year for everyone and I hate the thought of some of my co-workers having to pick up some of my work - but I'm going to try and keep up as much as I can. The night that I talked to them about decreasing my hours I slept the whole night through!! It relieved so much pressure and I have been sleeping sooo much better. And I feel like I'm so much more productive at work b/c I'm less tired and less stressed.

I just really want to do all I can so that when we go back in two weeks the hematoma is atleast shrinking and we get some good news. I don't want anything to happen to the babies and I do not want to end up on bed rest.

Yesterday my mom, sisters-in-law and I went maternity clothes shopping. Today I wore a pair of pants that Grammy K hemmed quickly for me and I was sooo much more comfortable today in elastic waist pants! I found quite a few things...had to do some real searching but we came up with some pretty cute stuff. It was a fun, but a super tiring day. It's tough work making maternity clothes look cute on a short girl.

Today I felt so sick again. I looked back and it was last Monday that was such a bad day for me too. I think the twins have already joined the rest of the world in hating Mondays:) They make it miserable for me. Luckily it's much more rare but it made for an awful day. I hate the tired, weak, lethargic way I feel. I can't wait to be back to my old self and not be so helpless.

I'm only 15 weeks and I already have a hard time getting out of bed and I get so out of breath going up the stairs. I wake up in the morning with pains in my lower stomach for the first few minutes and I can't stand up straight until I get going..I think it's my muscles and ligaments trying to stretch to compensate for my overnight growth! I do feel stretched to the max already and can't imagine what it will be like at the end. I started using cocoa butter with the hopes of avoiding stretch marks but I'm pretty sure I'll have them. I smell like chocolate the first few hours of the day - I'm sure everyone can guess that I'm religiously using it.

I feel like I complain alot! It definitely is not the most comfortable experience of my life - being pregnant - but I know the reward will be so worth it. I can't believe how much I've changed...from not being really certain if I wanted a baby (I finally just said "let's do it" b/c Eric was losing his patience waiting for me!) to loving these little 2 1/2 ounce apple sized 15 week babies soooo much. The weeks are going by so fast and I know it won't be long till they are here and we can relax b/c they've arrived safely.

14 week Belly pic

We've officially finished the 1st trimester!! Here's a new picture as of Friday. No hiding it

anymore, definitely showing now.

Sleep is still eluding me. Tonight I am so tired though I hope I fall right asleep for the entire night. I'm officially going crazy from lack of sleep and it's affecting everything in my life.

Eric has agreed that it's in our benefit to find out the genders of the babies. I was planning on finding out regardless, but I'm glad he gave his blessing! Our next sonogram is Feb 5th so we'll have to see if they can tell us or not....maybe we'll be able to give Uncle KC a little birthday surprise.

Today I did not feel well all day. Hopefully it was just a one day thing b/c I can't go back to being sick. The extreme tiredness and stress I feel from work doesn't help, it made for a very long 12+ hour day. I called my mom on my way home from work b/c I need her constant reassurance that everything is going to be fine...and I'm not crazy! Then, I got home and Eric had organized our pantry and done the dishes and folded a load of my laundry...he's been an all star lately and I'm glad he's been helping me so much b/c I can't get anything done when I get home from work.

We are so excited for the babies to come but enjoying the ride along the way. I thought I'd have a hard time and feel bad about gaining weight and growing a belly but can't believe how much I love it knowing my babies are inside. Eric loves to rub my belly too and Barkley snuggles close while he still can.

Thanks so much for your emails and prayers and for sharing in our excitement. It means so much to have support and know that people are thinking of us.